Emotions can be deceiving

Our brains are flooded with emotions all day.  How we feel about getting up, how we feel about going to work or school or running errands.  How we feel about how we look, how people look at us, what options we have to eat… We have emotions about what others are doing, what they’re saying, how they are viewing us and what we are going to do about it. How we perceive, as well as, how we deal with our emotions can have a great impact on all areas of our lives. For this reason often times our emotions play a large part in how good or bad we determine our day to be.  

For example, have you ever gotten all worked up over a situation you thought you had figured out? Ever been in a situation where you thought someone had wronged you in some way on purpose? Only to realize that what you thought you knew and what you thought they had done was all wrong?  Of course this doesn’t change how real those emotions were at the time. You may have even acted out, plotted revenge, or ruined a relationship because of those emotions, which you now regret and wish you could take back. 

You're not alone in this. It happens to everyone at one point or another because of this one simple truth:  Emotions can be deceiving.  They are highly unpredictable and change rapidly based on new information coming in minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day. Which is why they should not be used to make important and possibly life-changing decisions. When we are feeling emotionally upset, exhausted, frustrated and/or overwhelmed we don't think clearly. We tend to get tunnel vision and only see what we want to see. Rational thinking is thrown out of the window when dealing with such severe emotions and quickly love can become hate, confidence can become fear, friends and family become enemies, an inappropriate relationship seems possible… So easily the wrong choice appears to be the right one.  

Have you found yourself in this type of situation? Have you made some decisions based on “in the moment emotions” that you wish you could take back? Are you currently considering a major decision such as divorce, quitting your job, or ending a friendship because of overwhelming emotions? Is it possible that you're being deceived by the very emotions that are driving you to make that decision?  

Well, you don't have to follow through with your first instinct based on those feelings. There is a reason for the old saying, "hindsight is 20/20.” It's because once were out of the emotionally charged situation everything becomes clear, we can look back and see the whole picture and not just our small point of view in the moment.  So, give yourself some space for "hindsight" to become visible.  Stop! breathe, pray, think and ask questions to clarify before you make your final decision. Doing this allows you to recognize how you're feeling right now. When you know how you're feeling right now, in this moment, it gives you the knowledge and power to first deal with your emotions rather than jumping into action. Really determine if right now you're in the best state of mind to be making decisions. By doing so you give yourself and those around you the best chance at coming out of the situation with less regret. 

If you realize that you need support in clarifying emotional life decisions please feel free to contact me for your free initial consultation.

Nyshia Johnson

HD Christian Family Counseling, 14420 Civic Drive, Victorville, CA, 92392